Post #6: Maybe this internet dating stuff isn’t half bad!

So, I finally went on my first blind-date. It was actually really fun. We didn’t end up going bowling but we did settle on miniature golf. I was entertained by the fact that we were both equally bad. (Either that or he was pretending to me in an effort to make me feel better.) Either way, I had a good time. It was a little difficult to play (or attempt to play) and get to know each other at the same time so we decided to walk around afterwards. My first impression of him was that he was pretty cute, tall (like I like them) and had a silly personality. The convo went pretty smoothly and I wasn’t able to detect any major red flags, although he was a little heard to read so I wasn’t able to get a good idea of whether or not he was very interested, which makes me a little nervous.

I ended the date early because I was only able to park for an hour and a half without getting a ticket and I thought it was best to leave him wanting a little more for next time. So now I get to be a girl and wait by the phone. That’s why cell phones are great; you don’t have to actually do that! (Can you imagine girls back in the day parking a chair next to the non-cordless phone on the wall waiting for a second date?) Oh, how technology is becoming my friend!

For comparison’s sake, I thought I would summarize date # 1’s pros and cons. (Sorry date #1-thank god this is anonymous or I have a feeling I would definitely not score a date # 2!

Pros:

Good sense of humor

Good looking/Tall

Smart/Self-sufficient

Has a good job

Lots of hobbies/keeps busy

Likes interesting/spicy food

Never married/or has had kids

Cons:

Family is not nearby (could be a pro, depends on how you look at it!)

Little distant

Parents divorced at an early age

He may be unemployed soon due to company going out of business

Lesson learned: When it comes to being an internet dating snob, you shouldn’t knock it till you try it-date #1 set quite the precedence for the next guy!

Post #5: So I have managed to score myself a first date…

After multiple emails from different guys and passing out my # to a few, I have managed to set my first date this weekend with (I will call him Jake-for a little bit of anonymity.) Jake and I spoke on the phone for an hour or so last night to cover a few of the basics. He seemed like a nice enough guy. So far his positives consist of having lots of hobbies and keeping himself busy, we are interested in the same types of TV shows, he’s got a degree/ has good career plans and appears to be intelligent. My cons are that he doesn’t seem like he has a super close relationship with his fam (which I am lucky enough to have ;) They are all out of state. He wasn’t asking me to many questions during our convo (which could have bee a result of my excessive rambling in an effort to avoid a lull in the coversation) but his emails were the same way, and our phone call left me more with a friend type feeling more then anything else. But hey-I haven’t actually even met the guy so who knows! I’m pulling for bowling on our date. It’s a great combo of having an activity to keep ourselves distracted while having the time to get to know each other better. I pretty much suck at bowling so at the very least I will be able to bring the entertainment-everyone likes someone who can laugh at themselves right! Plus, there’s usually beer if it gets super uncomfortable. Most importantly, it’s a very public place-so while bowling balls could be considered a weapon, the chances of actually being murdered are slim to none.

Lesson learned: It takes a TON of wk (and patience) for a girl to get herself a first date, it’s a wonder these guys are single!

Post # 4: Manhunt VS Job Search one and the same…

OK, so it’s been a few weeks and I’m officially get fed up with the internet dating process. First if all, it is exhausting. Much like dating in general! The only other time in my life I felt similar was on a massive job search right after college. Really the two have amazing similarities! Check it out:

Step 1: Prescreen to narrow down jobs/dates.

Step 2: Application process. Dates get an email expressing interest as you hope for a response. Employers get a resume and cover letter.

Step 3: Elimination. Simultaneously you determine if the prospect is still a good fit while comparing that prospect to all the others. Polls of applicants are intermingled and some are kept while others are thrown out of the mixed because of lack of qualifications.

Step 4: Call back. If you are one of the chosen few, you have managed to receive a call asking you to participate in the interview process.

Step 5: Interview. Only after you have completed steps 1-4 you are in the presence of your date/job prospect. At this point, you are extremely nervous and competitive. And why shouldn’t you be really? The process has been lengthy and to fail at this point would feel like a giant waste of time! Questions are asked and answered all the while, the other individual is secretly judging you and determining you potential.

Step 6: Hired. You are now someone’s girlfriend or have obtained employment all the while contemplating… do I even really want this guy/job anymore or do I just not want to go through the process all over again!

Ahhhhhhh…I am seriously tired just writing about it. I know people say- but in the end it’s worth it and this is the only way to find your husband/career. But my goodness does it get tiring! I will prevail but in the meantime, I need a nap! This dating is serious business-and here I thought it was going be all fun and games!

Lesson learned…Dating is a full-time job and not for the faint at heart!

Post #3: You’ve got mail… (4 to be exact!)

I have successfully managed to correspond with four different guys. There is some part of me that gets a little excited at the prospect of “one new mail message” (or four in my case) After all, I pre-screened hundreds of men, I earned the right to enjoy a response for the ones that actually made it to the next round! After a few emails back and forth I noticed a small road block. If there is not a conversation connection, you will know by your third email. If the third email consist of the following-it’s doomed from the start. “Hi, I really like to go camping and playing basketball. Do you like outdoor activities? It was a really nice weekend this weekend. I like to read in my spare time and hang out with friends. Talk to you soon.” While this person may seem nice on the surface, that is exactly the problem. I call this man the surface skimmer. You have barely scratched the surface of each others lives and there is nothing about the conversation that makes you feel motivated to get to know this person. All the while your next prospect shoots you both a very intriguing email that is a perfect combination of thought provoking and witty. In comparison surface skimmer just doesn’t compare. (If you haven’t been able to keep track, that means I’m down to 3!) So, after you new prospect’s captivating third email, your feeling good. He responds to your sometimes hard to understand sarcasm with a little of his own and you’ve manage to develop quite the nice rapport. The next question is, what now? It would be perfectly understandable to meet this charming person who can hold their own right? For some reason I can’t seem to not be nervous at the idea of actually meeting these guys in person-maybe it’s because it’s just the first one? So, I decided I will give him my phone number and we can at least hear one another, I mean you want to make sure his voice doesn’t sound like a Gilbert Gottfried imitation (I’m sorry but in all my dream man fantasies, the parrot from Aladdin has never crossed my mind) or even worse, he has the cackle of the super annoying chick from Friends! AT that moment I had an epiphany. Moving slow has never hurt anyone-on the Internet or otherwise. And if he can’t deal with your three emails, phone calls, and dates rule-that’s OK because there is someone out there who will!

Lesson learned: Dating comes in three’s. If you can’t keep the momentum going until the next step-move on (there’s a reason the saying was developed: “there’s plenty of fish in the sea!”)